STK v ESS Rd 4
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Cheyenne left the Spaceship cursing the Sainter selectors for leaving us embarrassed for big man strength. I’m sure if you asked a 21 year old Lenny what he thought he’d be doing when he reached 33 years, then going up against Bellchambers or Hille for boundary ruck contests wouldn’t be on his radar. Even after they lost their CHForward we still looked like midgets.


Deciding to hold fire, that there must have been a reason for not picking Hickey, Cheyenne finally heard today that Hickey “wasn’t ready” (Scotters’ press conference). I know the info was there before today, but Cheyenne has decided to make a stand for intelligence and refuses to engage in mind-numbing, timewasting devices like shitter, Facewipe and the rest of them, and that includes hearing the same questions over and over again from snotty nosed ‘footy journalists’ whose number now exceeds the number of actual players.


Do any of these ‘journos’ tell us in their well paid missives why Siposs and Lee were omitted? NO. And if you think that’s hard to find out, try looking for an honest injury list, or even harder, details of Sandy’s weekend match. They may as well have been playing in Dagestan. Alas, we will be told, often, how to lose our life savings through Centrebet.

So, let’s go to the ‘known knowns’.


1. Milney had done his dash, and even when he kicks 3 goals his selfish antics result in at least 4 to the opposition. There must be a circus somewhere for him to ply his trade.


2. Much as I love them, Dal and Sam Fisher are brokenhearted, and their heads go down as soon as they’ve been beaten for the ball - forgetting that if you keep chasing, the opponent may make a mistake and you get it back. “Implied pressure” is now in the vocabulary of only a few, younger Saints (e.g Armitage and Steven).


3. Terry Milera lacks the body strength and intensity to compete against the top 11 sides. Same goes for Dennis-Lane.


4. If The Stallion Siposs is still too spooked by a few errors in the opening rounds, or too fragile to play 3 games in a row (he’s been on the list for 4 years!) then Karma help us, because a month ago he was touted as the Goddard replacement.


5. Spencer White was apparently BOG for Sandy (I received smoke signals from the Caspian Sea) and kicked 3 goals. A Sheedy, Malthouse and any number of coaches who trust in youth would be playing him this week, but the ghost of Ross Lyon still lingers, so don’t expect him to make his debut till 2044. They’ll bring back Kosi instead, and on the slippery Wellington nightime surface we’ll once again get to see poor Kosi’s inability to turn, chase or tackle. Imagine if they’d left him at CH Back - he did win the rising star there in his first year. It’s nearly all straight ahead running back there, but hey, what does an old Cheyenne know?


6. Farren Ray should never be keeping a young mid out of this side. He’s got one trick - he’s a very strong one on one mark if the other guy isn’t taller than him. His blind, long kicks into a forward line containing only Roo (with 2 or 3 on him) and The Midgets are heartbreaking.


All our veterans gave it everything for 6 years. We can’t knock Dal, Sam, Roo, Blakey, Goddard, Clint Jones and Monty. But surely it’s time to give the kids a go and see what they’ve got - and some of them aren’t even kids. Tom Ledger’s been around for 4 years, same with Lever to Beaver, and Jackson Ferguson (injured) should have been played by now.


Eventually we’ll be playing against a GWS side of 21 year olds with 50 games under their belt, whilst we ‘unveil’ Ledger, Ferguson, Lever and the others, who will be 28 before they get a chance.


My side for this week, from the backline:
B: Geary, Simpkin, Fisher, HB: Wright, Stanley, Roberton, C: Gilbert, Lenny, Monty, HF: Dal, Riewoldt, Lee, F: Saad, White, Siposs, R: McEvoy, Armitage, Steven, INT: Hickey, Dunnell, Ross, Ledger


IN: Lee, White, Siposs, Hickey, Dunnell, Ledger
OUT: Maister (inj), Milne (circus), Ray, Milera, Dennis-Lane, Jones


But don’t hold your breath - I’d bet my teepee on them playing Kosi, Blakey, Ray, Dennis-Lane, Milne (if he gets off the charge of biting his handler), Milera and Jones (who toiled his guts out again last week and got 31 disposals, trouble is 23 of them went into the water near Shed 9 and our cash-strapped footy department are still looking for them, along with the entire Footscray playing list and coaching panel).


Cheyenne Autumn